googles: margaritaville hollywood fl wedding price
jellyfish, driftwood, white claw, WINGZ, shooters
there’s no hiking in miami because the trees, the
animals, the manatees, the tree sap is hostile to people
(google: juan ponce de leon death)
unless you have a python hunting license.
what if everyone died but you and me? or just me?
or maybe, the cat lives? and only the cat.
googles: why are the cops always at hooters hialeah
“call your relatives in cuba for the low low price of”
a waitress gave me a tampon and i wept;
her breasts defied biology, a newly discovered sphere,
looping the AMC in an electric scooter
toddlers wailing in bad boyz 4 life
googles: can i have my wedding at tgi fridays?
i was a clock ticking until i took a beta blocker
now i can hear the ticking but from very very
very very very very very very very far away
googles: how to politely uninvite my family to my wedding?
a bot keeps posting porn in my dead friend’s memorial
facebook group called “Remembering Lindsay” and i
report it but facebook won’t take it down because the
asshole isn’t spread wide enough and her mom is in the group
and so is the guy she died next to, who spent the next
day selling her designer purses to random drug dealers
before calling the cops who did nothing but say to her mom
“a lesson in protecting your daughter from creeps!” because
we all know he killed her, like definitely killed her, but whatever
here’s to the creeps that kill you and take your purses and
the mothers who are mad because the purses are gone now
and to covid-19, a disease that made nobody care when
somebody poor was murdered.
years later the boyfriend posts in the group to say, please stop
slandering my name, i didn’t kill her, i just took her purses.